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Postby Avonleamarilla » Nov 28, 2012 10:46 am

Well, it has been 5 nights since I cut my 450 mg generic lithium ER pill into
approximately 325-ish bits ("the horror, the horror!" John Cady is rolling around in his grave, I'm sure) ;)
and I have taken them each night, and I'm feeling GOOD! :)))

My husband knows the truth about it all now - what a relief - he knows my selling my precious wedding ring to see the new $300/hour, no Medicare-accepted-super-fancy-office shrink for a 2nd opinion (since my regular shrink is against my choice to go med-free), he knows about my tapering over the summer, & he knows my decision that I am tapering slowly off lithium no matter what and I shall give a med-free life a proper shot. Because I fucked up in the past four years ago, and went off lithium cold-turkey, uninformed and relapsed, he has baggage about that, and he has a total right to be freaked out.

He and I are blessed to be seeing our low-cost holistic counselor about this who is in favor of my going med-free, and we are even seeing my regular shrink together this Friday to see if we can work with him...."Dr. A" called me yesterday and said he wants to be part of what I'm up to (!!!!), he really likes my husband (he doesn't really like women!!!) and my husband likes him, so there's a chance he will help me with my goal to taper slowly with proper amounts, not my crazy-ass cuts.

I'm not feeling so lovey-dovey about my new shrink I saw for the first time last week. She told me on the phone she could help me taper off lithium, but she neglected to tell me things I really needed to know about her fees and requirements. After I saw her last Wednesday for my intake, I was upset about something and so I left her a totally civil message asking for clarification about her massive fees. She & I have another appointment set for Dec. 12

She has not called me back yet. She didn't go out of town for Thanksgiving as far as I know. This is a big no-no for me, not to return my calls within several business days, especially since i am a new patient who was referred to her by a friend who is a steady client of hers. *Maybe* she did not get my message, & I need to give her the benefit of the doubt,
but I'm wondering about her now & I don't want to work with her. It's bullshit not to call me back because she managed to cash my $300 check yesterday. I know I'm not being clear or 100% rational about this, but I fucking hate the system so much and I cannot WAIT to be free of it as much as possible. I'd love to stay with Dr. A at this point - at least he doesn't charge us a shit load like the new shrink.

I'm getting there!!! A slow taper is the key, and I'm doing it well!!!!

I find it so awesome that last week I realized for the past 8 or so months I was diluting the lithium in my system ANYWAY
by drinking a gallon of water a day and losing 60 pounds. Both the new shrink and a chemist confirmed me that I would be diluting it. My depression/fatigue lifted soon after I started doing that routine, and I believe that due to a "non-therapeutic" level of lithium in my body, I was lowering its bad side effects. It's a theory, but I think it could be true!!!

I drink a big glass of water every hour from 8AM to 6 PM and I also walk four miles in an hour almost every day. I do take one rest day a week on average. My diet is not good (too much sugar) but I'm working on that.

Thank God for your support, Icarus Folk. I could not have come this far without you! I'm still seeking success stories for the those with bipolar (or whatever!) who got off lithium and have been med-free and stable. Please let me know if you hear anything!
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Postby triciafishDE » Nov 28, 2012 6:37 pm

I'm coming to your house. I need someone to help me lose 60lbs!
I can't even use meds as an excuse. It's my own hand mouth addiction. Oh sweet sugar even though I justify my former antipsychotics to messing my brain up to crave sugar, I know that I have the power to say "no".

Should I titrate off sugar? Maybe going cold turkey might make me a homicidal maniac. They say sugar can change your brain like cocaine can...

I'm so Happy for you Dyane!

Keep up the good work.
Keep venting. You know God is listening if no one else is.

<p><font color="#808080"> </font><span class="UIStory_Message">&lrm;" We must rapidly begin the shift from a "thing-oriented" society to a "person-oriented" society." Martin Luther King, Jr</span></p>
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