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I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

What place does spiritual practice have in our lives and in our emotions? How do our visions of the divine and feelings of interconnectedness relate to living with madness? What is our place within a framework greater than human civilization, and how does this affect our daily struggles?

I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Aug 16, 2017 5:28 pm


I have finally arrived at a new rehabilitation centre, but the drugs are making me so exhausted during the day that I generally do not wake up properly till about 7O'clock at night as mentioned in my Miserable (not) and Manic thread.
I am quietly confident that staff here are impressed with my Icarus project posts and this is my first post from the new establishment.

I just posted this as my first comment on the Icarus project web site since coming here.

I had to sign an agreement form which includes things like I can't use a memory stick to copy all my documents onto this computer unless I first ask for permission first.

It is a minor miracle I am on the internet at all. Apparently although one of the few things I had time to ask when staff from Storthfield House came to see me was whether they had WiFi here and they said "Yes." But it was a totally ambushed meeting at which I wanted to show Dr Umeide that I had been going high enough to discover that Jesus taught a version of nirvana like the Buddha did. The Buddha taught the end of old age sickness and death. He taught how to become IINFINITELY MASOCHISTIC. "If you do not smile when bandits saw you to pieces with a two handed saw, then you are not a follower of the Buddha." Jesus taught nirvana directly. If you have real faith in the resurrection of Christ, like I insist I do, then you can enjoy any brutal end of life, even literal crucifixion.

My mother thought that Mother Mary Saint Theresa at Saint Aloysius in 1964-5 was quite a sour puss. But she did teach me the basics of my messianic vision of the Pentecost of Christ which I insist is the same thing as the Paranirvana of the Buddha or the Pentecost of Di Chisholm which is what makes this messiah not be recognised in his own home. I have been asking ever since I came here for them to get a Catholic priest to see me as I am quite confident I can do my George Fox impersonation better among people who really DO believe that Jesus Christ is the closest friend anyone needs to have. I even got close to telling this to Father Frank Waterman at the Salford Royal Catholic Chaplaincy but he never came to visit me despite repeated promises. I have succeeded in giving him two crucial parts of the Salford Green Party scriptures, the Salford Green Party Library which arch-Pharisee Margaret Calvert must have found so objectionable that she must have blocked her phone to me after I asked her to consider putting some books on Buddhism in the library at Sale Meeting House. The Mental Health Act Compliance Officer here, Amy Bradley, has borrowed a copy of the Vimalakirti Nirdesh from me, along with the book about it which I have successfully delivered to Stella Green during the visit at which I successfully idiotically sexually assaulted her --- "The Inconceivable Emancipation" by Sangharakshita. This is the only scripture on the messianic vision of a second century Messiah you will need. Amy says she has read half the third chapter, which apparently is more than Stella has.

Can Stella please read the whole of this book, and if she wants the scripture itself then the best translation is the one by Robert Thurman, Can you please get Eric Wood or the unknown woman I successfully gave a copy to at the first totally balls up meeting for worship I actually attended at Eccles --- to write a review of Vision and Transformation by Sangharakshita and post it under spirituality at the Icarus project site.

Spirituality, where most of my posts are:

Please can Quakers please go to one of the oldest and best pages. It describes my friendship with brutal murderer Floyd Bailey who after my last letter written in early August 2016 and my having sent him the book which I am waiting for Chris Green to read and review, "The Drama of Cosmic Enlightenment: Myths, Parables and Symbols in the White Lotus Sutra" -- Floyd has actually asked me to send him more information about the Bodhisattva Ideal! Because I told him to expect direct mind to mind transfer, like I have from the Dalai Lama he is dedicating the hours of 3pm to 6pm Pacific Summer time to praying to me. He has real faith in me and has sent me five letters while I have been incarcerated.

Here is the link

This is the second page

This Miserable (not) and Manic describes how I struggle with depression caused by far too much medication but can still go as manic as I NEED to in my I NEED a Miracle posts of which I am thoroughly proud. The second and third posts are what should be my manifesto. I even said I thought I was within a month of my ultimate goal to be allowed to be as manic as I need to be in the community off all medication. They can see how delightfully high I was when I came here. I will need to be higher still if my latest plot to change the nature of the universe by teaching people to be aware that this universe really does exist in multiple loops of time as string theory suggests. On August 23 at 3am I discovered that everything in the universe is travelling at the speed of light. That constant gives rise to nearly all the rules of physics. If one remembers what it says in the Upanishads about universes that exist, that is have a forward speed of light, universes that do not exist, that is have a backwards direction of time and speed of light, universes that neither exist nor do not exist, that is have a direction of speed of light and time that is the square root of an negative number or an imaginary universe, or universes that both exist and do not exist, that is where the speed of light and time are a negative imaginary number -- then one has a remarkable way of teaching the ills of pharasaical eldering, which is any suffering at all designed to change or obstruct someone else's behaviour. It literally causes whole universes to disappear down a black hole, like death, to reappear out of a white hole, like birth The Buddha taught the end of death and birth. As a bodhisattva he would have said the end of involuntary birth. One who has passed into paranirvana after death can choose any rebirth they want, and a particularly fortuitous one would be to a Quaker family.

This all gave rise to an idea I call the INFINITE MEETING FOR WORSHIP. I later called the idea Quaker Quantum Mechanics which explains miracles like my disappearing belongings and the fact I am so totally unafraid of violent death I was provoking the most dangerous patients on the ward to attack me as vigorously as they would want. It is based on the George Fox principle of equality, which is the Buddhist principle of equanimity or a love that is equally directed at every single subatomic particle in all universes. That is what Christ meant when he said "Be ye perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect." The Sermon on the Mount is really all you need to endure crucifixion at the hands of the Romans or even the living crucifixion of ridiculous sentences passed by US courts or the living crucifixion of community treatment orders that have made this bodhisattva unable to even see his own enlightenment until Leon Benson pointed it out in his "Superb Letter from Leon Benson"

Miserable (Not) and Manic

Here is Superb Letter From Leon Benson

If I had succeeded in reading this letter plus the other one mentioned in my "First Short letter to The Friend" I might not have wasted the ten months between the September 6 Sunday Meeting for Worship at Central Manchester Quakers and my admission vainly hoping that Wendy Olsen would realise I had finally found in the Salford Green Party a political organisation worth dying for as I have found the Quaker religion well worth dying for. I just wish that a generosity bodhisattva called S.P. had not deleted my entire call history just after Chris Green did his most disastrous ever bit of Pharasaical eldering ever by denying me my precious First Amendment Right to Freedom of Speech and Freedom of Religion. Surely being incarcerated in a mental hospital which could even now be considering putting me on even more brain disabling medication -- makes it even more precious that I have the opportunity to write like this.

Re: Bug Reports

Postby oregonjunco » Aug 16, 2017 7:43 pm

There appears to have been a problem a couple of weeks ago when the web address, which I copied into an important e-mail, "Short Letters to The Friend" which I have successfully corrected on the spirituality thread --- gave an extra which although it must have been correct at the time has now been corrected to the I had been sending the messages in the thread I NEED a Miracle thread to about 120 people, including most of my local Quaker Friends, but after I sent the "Second Short Letter to The Friend" someone who did not reveal herself, but almost certainly Margaret Calvert, the clerk to Manchester and Warrington Area Quakers, and thus the most important person that I need to convince there has never been a mental illness in my life, merely the Zen meditations of putting oneself under so much pressure that even the psychiatrist at my new establishment is convinced I have such a serious schizo-affective psychosis he was at first considering increasing the dose by putting me on quetiapine and a mood stabiliser as well!
Margaret Calvert must have sent out a devastating e-mail saying you can block his e-mail if you don't want to receive his e-mails. 25 people then blocked their e-mail addresses including many of the people I respect highly and just wanted to offer them $500 to read my Icarus project posts so far. Because the only one of my five e-mail addresses I can access from my mobile phone is my I will have to forward my posts to someone who can post them on for me.
In trying to get people to access the Icarus project forum there is a false link on the main access page,
I told people to access and then drop down on resources to online support and then click on internet forum in the text, and like Chris Green has been complaining the link does not work. I just did this on the internet enabled computer here at Storthfield House and the link goes to a page at which does not work. Please fix this link. It has been a right pain. I am still hoping for a miracle as I managed to print copies of most of my Icarus project posts on the occupational therapy computer at Meadowbrook a couple of days before I was savagely transferred to a new hospital about ninety miles from any of my friends. Staff who have read them say things like they show I am exceptionally intelligent and have a very creative mind. I just need the opportunity to find some way to copy a document I have written on my own laptop onto this computer and then print it out and get Dr Logan Naidu to actually read out the eight documents in support of my history.
Before I came here I thought the most pressing problem to solve was "Why did Christ attack the money lenders in the temple." At what I had been expecting to be the climax of my Fabian campaign against Dr Umeide I asked him that question and he just said he would not discuss religion with me. I wanted to tell him I had worked out that Christ was executed for being a paranoid schizophrenic with a truly messianic vision just because he could not give a history. I am still hoping to give a history to Dr Naidu so that he will end this 40 and a half year nightmare of keep getting my basic Zen meditation which is to develop superpsychoses, confused with a psychosis that has not yet matured.
Last edited by oregonjunco on Sep 05, 2017 3:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Aug 25, 2017 7:59 pm

Does this link work?
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Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby FLAMING ATTACK B0T » Aug 25, 2017 9:09 pm

This one?

...I've been using for a long time and it still is how I access the forums.
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Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Sep 02, 2017 3:27 am

These were the texts I was sending to my first proper overseer, Chris Green, who is probably the closest of all my friends among the Quakers. That is why he disappointed me so much when he first came to see me as he assumed I had an illness that needed to be treated with better medication. He was incapable of listening to the truth, which was that I was nearer to finding the essence of why I had a tendency to be manic and I was hoping to return to being manic in private in the community with nobody complaining, like I had been on and off since definitely September 2015 and also as long ago as February 2015.
What had brought these manias to a head was my determination to find a political platform for my Zen socialist ideas. In Salford Green Party I thought I had found a group of people I could have had a real dialogue with. In 1982-1994 I thought I had found in Red Rope a group of people with a brilliant idea that would be a lot better if organised according to the principles of Buddhist socialism. You can read about that chapter of my life in
Buddhist socialist enterprises in 1991
This was written when I had been on modecate (prolixine) injections for two years and was desperately subpsychotic and hardly able to maintain my superpsychosis. The simple idea that if a nurse would just give me a number I could explain how that person or group of people had entered my superpsychosis was fervently persecuted, as you can tell from the letter.
As my superpsychosis developed after I took the trouble to borrow almost the entire tape library of over two hundred taped lectures by Sangharakshita and took my fiancée, Marie on about five of the London Buddhist Centre retreats my superpsychosis had developed enough to win a tribunal. I think my superpsychosis is even more mature now, but I am hampered by even higher doses of an even nastier depot.
You can read the letter that won my 1994 Mental Health Appeal Tribunal when I wrote a spiritual introduction to myself for a London Buddhist Centre retreat at Water Hall as the third post in my
Letter to My First Meditation Teacher, July 17, 2016

Tom Lathom <>
1:15 AM (6 hours ago) to Steven

Tom Lathom <> Aug 17
to christopherjoh., stella.green1, diane.ratcliffe, danielle

Texts sent to Chris Green 7/8/2017
09:19 Where exactly are you now residing? 9:42 Why do you have to end a steadfast and at times enjoyable friendship.09:51 Are you aware of the warning messages that your Icarus link throws up?

09:53 I would like to continue this correspondence by email. Please will you forward back to me what I know from the fact I was in a very deep meditational state when I was writing them in repose to my ONLY incoming phone call from any Quaker -- please will you forward back to me the texts that caused me to lose my first Amendment right to freedom of speech and freedom of religion by staff taking my mobile phone off me despite my writing in one of my e-mails 10:02 now put up on http:// telling the story of how a generosity bodhisattva called Stuart Potts stole my mobile phone when I would have assumed a nincompoop by the name of Callam Doherty should at least have put it somewhere more secure than on the end of the desk nearest the door --- Stuart Potts the used it to make a couple of phone calls and THEN DELIBERATELY OR ACCIDENTLY DELETED MY ENTIRE HISTORY OF ALL MY TEXTS SINCE JUNE 25 AND 10:11 CALL HISTORY. I was devastated. I was so proud of those texts trying to get you to realise you were acting like a Pharisee. I do not know how to tell you that in a way that is less than forceful. Please return those texts to me before I dare tell anyone in Manchester so called Friends where I am. Please will you demonstrate you are not a Pharisee by posting a reply to any of my posts, especially those that seem to have been taken badly by Arch-Pharisee 10:25 Margaret Calvert. Please look at Long texts sent to Mum and please can you print three copies of it and send two to Mum at
Mrs Connie Willett
583 Anniesland Road
Glasgow G 13 1UX
and one to my godmother Joan Fletcher. Telephone my mother and please persuade her to let her daughter teach her how to read texts. My life would be totally transformed if Mum was not so technophobe that she insists on only using the mobile phone to tell her ever so loyal 10:35 daughter which carriage of the train from Glasgow is she on. I NEED a new mobile phone as most people cannot hear me at all on it and the radio headphones socket has stopped working.
Please can you telephone my mother on 0141 959 3424 to tell her your side of the story as she refuses to read my texts and her daughter evidently has refused to print out this post which asks for seven CDs from her a Christmas present.
I do not know about 10:56 an error message on web page. The link on Internet forum from the home page was saying page not found. But the links by were. This link has been corrected.
Here are a few:
Infinite Psychosis and Messiahhood for All
Buddhist Socialist Projects in 1991
Letters to a Man in Seclusion on my Ward
And the one that actually won my 1994 mental health appeal tribunal
Letter 11:06 to my First Meditation Teacher 17 July 1996
My finest web page is from a true disciple. I am wondering what he has not written a response to my two large bundles posted about three weeks ago to him.
From a Brutal Murderer Bodhisattva, Floyd Bailey
And page 2
Please respond here to my formal request that nominations committee bring forward the names of two Friends, 11:47 one from Manchester Central Meeting and one from another meeting to start a correspondence with Floyd Bailey with a view to accepting him into membership as a Quaker homeless jihadist residing abroad. Can Area Meeting please pay for a subscription to The Friend to all seven of my prisoner friends. I know they are all impressed with my testimony to equality based on having an equanimity equally directed at every single subatomic particle in ALL UNIVERSES. 11:55

More texts sent to Chris Green 7/8/2017 11:55
My life has been totally transformed by subscribing to The Friend for only the last about five issues. Friends never did sort out the free year 's subscription I was supposed to get when I became a member in 2007. Liz Green's most stupid Pharasaical eldering of all, (apart from killing Di Chisholm) was to tell me I couldn't use my blindfold and toe clip strap at Mount Street after I
had realised it wasn't working sitting in the Friends" Room on my own Because it is a sadistic practice dependent on someone else at least tolerating the sight of you in bondage. When I asked staff to at least give me an advice or query to meditate on or perhaps an article from The Friend they exceeded my wildest dreams by actually giving me some copies that were labelled "You can take these issues away." Liz Green had refused to take a history. I will continue via e-mail after lunch.

10/08/2017 23:38
Sorry. I have just spent nearly two hours copying all your old texts to memo, so I can paste them into e-mail and eventually be able to print or web publish. I accidently deleted that one when it was on my clipboard so I pasted it back, forgetting it would send to you. Rereading my posts I am struck that they all display the six perfections of a bodhisattva, when one takes into consideration that Skilful Means can be regarded as the seventh perfection.
23:46 Please read chapter three of "The Inconceivable Emancipation" pages 45-62 "On Being All Things to All Men" If I am to insist I am infinitely masochistic, and thus know how to enjoy even being ran over by a metro or train, then I can be expected to attack the money lenders in the temple every time I feel I have just lost a precious opportunity to have someone take a history. I intend to only tell people where I am who can demonstrate they have read and
23:47 From Chris
Thanks for your messages. will try your link tomorrow meanwhile good night!
23:53 responded e-mails and Icarus project posts especially by being the first British person to post a reply! Please e-mail me your comments as I have not even attempted to get my laptop connected to the Internet and the ee signal is so poor that I often have to wander the corridors to find a signal to send my texts and e-mails from my mobile phone.
Dr Logan Naidu has said he intends to put me on quetiapine as well as a mood stabiliser before he will 11/08/2017 00:10 consider reducing my clopixol that if he has taken a history he would have known was caused by the total persecution of what my "I NEED a Miracle" posts which were my attempts to get everyone to see the process in action as I have actually become a pacifist suicide bomber. Eventually I would like to find Terry Waite's address from the letter he sent me that I cannot find so that I can train him into sorting out conditions in solitary confinement in US 00:11 prisons while he teaches me how to go to ISIS to convert them to Quaker jihad and Quaker Terrorism. You can read more about these on my post "From a Heavenly Bodhisattva, Patrick Swiney" Also look at the last post in

"Voluntary Incarceration as the Superpsychotic Road to Nirvana."

Please write some comments there.
10:04 10/08/2017 Sorry but I can't get your link to work. The Icarus project is difficult for me to access as an individual. It just worked for me now.

More texts sent to Chris Green 10/08/2017 10:46
From a Heavenly Bodhisattva, Patrick Swiney
A Buddhist Vision of the Blessed Trinity

Infinite Psychosis and Messiahhood for All
Letters From a George Fox 1652 Mahayana bodhisattva
Letters From a Patience Bodhisattva, Billy Brown
Letter to My First Meditation Teacher, 17 July 2016
The last page is the best I wrote on my 1989-1994 depots.
Letters to a Man in Seclusion on my Ward
Yesterday I became a pacifist suicide bomber when I finally worked out how to enjoy having a train sever one's head, like Ian Muir did.

That should be enough to get you going. Can you please forward this round to elders and overseers, apart from Margaret Calvert and Wendy Olsen, ask those who 11:01 BLOCKED their e-mail address to unblock it and to please read the Short Letters to The Friend again with an icarus project link that should work and please tell me why these should not have been an early climax to the I NEED a Miracle thread.
I need to ask Robert Lizar to pay volunteers to read and review my Icarus project posts so written summaries can be presented to a mental health appeal tribunal.

From Chris 12:46
Following unknown links carries with them repeated warnings, which I imagine is why Friends like me are hesitating to read them. Can you suggest another way of accessing your material on Icarus?
I have been unable to access my own icarus project posts since last Thursday at Meadowbrook. The link to the Internet forum from the Internet resources page was not working then. Today I hope to get occupational therapy to either connect my own laptop to one of five WiFis available but I need a password or get onto the occupational therapy computers. I need to buy the Swarthmore Lecture and to ask friends to give me as detailed accounts of The Retreat 13:02 and Salter lectures. I saw last year's Salter lecture, a play about Salter at Marple Friends. When I come off medication I should be able to download a lot of Yearly Meeting Gathering from the Bronze Age Internet, of course . I am still hoping for a miracle if they just TAKE A HISTORY. Can they just try to pacify a bodhisattva or let me show I am practicing the seven perfections of a bodhisattva? 13:26 Can you please get in touch with Robert Lizar to ask him to represent me at a Mental Health Appeal Tribunal. I want him to present the case that I am obviously a Messiah and today I have worked out that the reason we have original sin is so that great thinkers like Isaiah, Gautama the Buddha, Lao Tsu, Jesus Christ and Mohammed could work out ways to overcome suffering and teach us ultimately a connection to the Bronze Age Internet. I have sorted a good 13:46 connection in Hell thanks to the Pentecost of Jesus, the Buddha and Di Chisholm.
In "The Myth of Mental Illness" by Thomas Szach he argues that compulsory treatment denies all human reason. Treatment should be voluntary psychoanalysis or psychotherapy to help someone with their spiritual problems, rather than vandalising the brain with drugs because you don't like their behaviour. ALL the times when I appear to be my most belligerent are the times when I 13:40 have known my mental health has been excellent. The reason your last visit was a disaster is that you completely ambushed me by giving me zero time to prepare for something so important. You never gave me the chance to enquire about Glenthorne, which could quite easily have seen the miracle end of this nightmare. I am killing myself laughing at the fools everyone else is making of this farce that will end as soon as I get enough photocopying and access to 13:43 printing letters typed up on my laptop to send to far more prisoners, especially those on death row or subjected to INFINITE BOREDOM.

More texts sent to Chris Green 10/08/2017 13:50
Please can you forward back to me those texts for which you succeeďed in denying me my First Amendment rights to freedom of speech and religion in early December last year. I felt really proud of them as they demonstrated how I dealt with Pharisees who would not even let me explain I came in with the best mental health I have ever had on depots. The Chaucer Ward head injury convinced me I could rely on a resurrection to guide me through any truly idiotic 13:58 death. Last Sunday morning one convinced me I had mastered pain and death enough to be able to enjoy a death by self - immolation or a train decapitating my head.
14:03 Can you please forward these texts to interested friends, including Branwen McHugh, Alan Pinch and Chris Lukey? I am concerned that I sent to Alan Pinch a couple of vital over 100 pages of documents in time for the Wednesday Meeting for Worship a week and a half before the YMG and a nurse betrayed me by not posting it when she had promised she would. They were found in the office on the Thursday after. When I phoned Alan a couple of days before YMG he did not seem to 14:06 know what I was talking about. I have not yet received a reply to a long e-mail requesting a change of address to my subscription to The Friend.

Please read and respond to this e-mail. I am finally superspychotic enough to be able to endure any psychotropic medication they give me, but I am still waiting for the opportunity to give a complete history of my superpsychoses. I am now and have always been since I first received Vajrayana initiation from the Yoruba or Ibo cultures an advanced bodhisattva who has been exploring the fundamental Zen koan of Christianity, which is solved by Quaker Quantum Mechanics, which even explains the scientific theory behind the resurrection of Christ and Lazarus.
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Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Sep 02, 2017 4:02 am

On Thu, 3 Aug 2017 at 12:58, Tom Latham <> wrote:
---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Tom Lathom <>
Date: Thu, 3 Aug 2017 at 11:07
Subject: please read my latest post
To: <>, Steven Willett <>

Letter to My First Meditation Teacher 17 July 2016

I am terrified that I am being transferred to Cambian Hospital, Nottingham tomorrow and although two weeks ago I was promised enough escorted leave to do all my errands like getting my eyes tested for new glasses, going to Wyndsors in Pendlebury for several pair new shoes, going home to use my own computer printer to print out enough copies of my posts to send them to my all important prisoner friends, and even picking up my Documents in Advance for the crucial Britain Yearly Meeting Gathering, which started last Friday and which was the deadline I set myself for finally solving the problem of why Jesus Christ attacked the money lenders in the temple, even though as a bodhisattva of the deathless state, and thus someone who is prepared for a martyr's death just like all the early Christians who positively welcomed a death by crucifixion. --- I was only given two hours ten minutes leave to go home for my belongings. I HAVE SOLVED IT. He was using skilful means as a sadistic bodhisattva, but was not a Buddha until during his scourging when he finally forgave them and reached clearest perfect nirvana. It is only necessary to forgive your enemies and you are literally prepared for a martyr's death. I realise I would positively welcome being kicked to death by the man who has already given another unpopular patient who is regarded as a nonce because he desecrated the wreaths on the cenotaph -- a beating with his steel toe capped boots that he has already smashed my radio with and I fear he may kick my head in next time I am lying in the corridor waiting for the other patients to come down for their smoke break.

I am sorry that even this brief note has ended up displaying the overinclusive thought disorder that characterises a mania caused by the drugs. It is because they are crippling my creativity that I cannot write in the concise style I am so proud of writing in a letter to the Water Hall Retreat team in 1994. It was originally intended as a letter to a Buddhist retreat team but I presented it to my mental health appeal tribunal to show I was not deluded with my grandiose vision.

I now feel I have a Buddhist vision of Christianity because I, like Jesus am prepared to give my life for my friends because I personally have forgiven every single person on this world. Even Ian Brady is a sadistic bodhisattva using skilful means to help some innocent children to have something to forgive him for. He is liberated from purgatory because I have forgiven him. I have made sure that if you choose a Tibetan Hell realm, where one will have a rebirth as an adult, but suffering the worst excesses of the suffering you have caused in this life, there are bodhisattva aplenty to teach alcoholics to do the twelve steps to become an alcoholic bodhisattva.

You could really do with asking Press John and Freda 0161 793 4876 to come and talk to you about how John was an unreformed alcoholic whom Freda actually divorced before he went in an AA group in Blackpool and saw the light. They have now remarried. It is a wonderful story of redemption through having faith in a higher power.

I intend to ask them to come to a group I want to start on Wednesday afternoons at Mount Street called "Meeting the Bodhisattvas." Would you like to come with a couple of other priests to tell us how you first came to your vocation? Father frank Waterman, when he read the first two posts of my "Miserable (not) and Manic" thread said I was obviously filled with the Holy Spirit. It was Pentecost Sunday, the thirty fifth anniversary of his ordination.

Please read the most recent post in the thread. I am sorry I insulted you by including the posts I was writing as I could feel I was striving for something huge. Christ taught a nirvana that liberates you from all suffering, even a martyr's death. It is called the Sermon on the Mount. "Be ye perfect, as your heavenly father is perfect." I envy your position as the minister of the sacrament of confession. I forgive bastards who have no intention of asking for forgiveness like Dr Umeide who at what should have been the climax, when I asked him why did he think Jesus attacked the money lenders in the temple merely replied that he would not discuss religion!
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Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Sep 02, 2017 4:14 am

This one is in the wrong order but I got an error message when I tried to post the whole post and just managed to post the end of it last time. I am now seeing if it will post shorter segments of the post.

I got this:
Return to the index page

General Error

SQL ERROR [ mysql4 ]

Incorrect string value: '\xF0\x9F\xA4\x97\xF0\x9F...' for column 'post_text' at row 1 [1366]

An SQL error occurred while fetching this page. Please contact the Board Administrator if this problem persists.

Please notify the board administrator or webmaster:

That e-mail address bounces.

This was the last e-mail I wrote from Meadowbrook just before we went home to pick up my belongings in a chaotic two hours and ten minutes. The original post at the bottom was to Fr Paul Smith, who had politely asked me to remove his name from my mailing list. I wanted to write a short e-mail giving him a clue as to what I had been up to and begging him to read my latest post on the "Letter to My First Meditation Teacher" but he had already BLOCKED his e-mail address, which I regard as an extreme measure to be taken without even replying to me. I still cannot understand why people should choose to deny someone their First Amendment Right to Freedom of Speech and Freedom of Religion so flippantly. It was something far more sinister than simply many people suddenly becoming fed up with my long posts on the I NEED a Miracle thread. Probably Margaret Calvert took it upon herself to scare me s******s by getting my internet service provider to block every single one of the 137 addresses I had sent it to including my most trusted friends and even my own address. Fortunately it seems to only be temporary as I accidently resent the last post in the thread before all the e-mails were blocked and it only returned two addresses that were errors. Unfortunately I could not use my e-mail to get anyone going to Yearly Meeting gathering to take notes for me of what was going on. I did not even receive my documents in advance, although I booked a place on it. I will need to wait until I get access to the Bronze Age Internet again to access the whole conference.
I also continue to write about my messianic vision and how it relates to Jesus' vision. I write about Dr Umeide refusing to take any history whatsoever.

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: "Tom Lathom" <>
Date: 7 Aug 2017 17:18
Subject: Fwd: Re: please read my latest posts
To: <>, "Steven Willett" <>

This was the last long e-mail I wrote on my tablet. By fluke of fate I left it behind at Meadowbrook and am waiting for it to be returned to me by registered post. I need a new one anyway as I think it was stolen from Lynn Jackson but she has not responded to a text and an e-mail. Please read at least a few of my icarus project posts and comment there.

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: "Tom Lathom" <>
Date: 4 Aug 2017 01:15
Subject: Re: please read my latest posts
To: "Cindy" <>, "GellyBean1974" <>, "Jillian Creasy" <>, "John Cox" <>, "MM Osborne" <>, "Mun Reporter" <>, "Nicholas Corbett" <>, "Shannon Oakley" <>, "Steven Willett" <>, "Valerie Buford" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "" <>, "wendy Olsen" <>, "" <>

I went for a buggered up visit home this evening.

I was hoping for miracles but I only got the name and e-mail address of one neighbour, my next door neighbour, Clare Jones.

I did not get a chance to look for my miraculously disappeared box of computer discs and could not find my CDrom of "The Art of Ife." I had no chance to search for my Aldi grocery receipts which my bastard community psychiatric nurse denies putting in the blue bin for paper despite the fact he is the only person to use the kitchen since I came in and the surfaces have had all the receipts and food removed from them.

I have found one of my miracle bags of universe mending gear. It was a tough green carrier bag full of books, including my 2016 LOMA . This is the address book of all the local Quakers. My 2017 one appears to have disappeared as has my black Truth Never Dies tee shirt. Could you e-mail me the design for the tee shirt so I could arrange a UK print run for our own fundraising?

It also contained my library copy of the Vimalakirti Sutra and my decent translation of the glorious Qur'an.

Kevin Corcoran and Dr Williams were the only people who witnessed my delight at packing up a full pack of universe mending gear. This green bag disappeared down a black hole on August 24, 2016 and reappeared out of a white hole AFTER my last visit on 23 June.

I picked up one camera and a suitcase and my mail which did not include my documents in advance for. Quaker Yearly Meeting Gathering or any letters from prisoners.

I had originally been told that I could not go home until after I had seen Dr Umeide but he never cane onto the Ward. Beth insisted on giving me my depot before she went off work at 7:45pm but without reading to me. She promised the night staff would but they are reluctant so I guess it is no universe mending session for me.

I had been hoping that Norman Gordon would read out "Letter to a Man in Seclusion on my Ward." He really likes it but I w anted to hear his reactions to each part. He was too stoned from cannabis to do very much.

I now realise I take after Ksitigarbha who liberates beings from Hell before incarnating in human form. That is why you need to write to and Barbara Brooks at as they both blocked me after I assumed Margaret Calvert clogged up my in box with twenty five blocked e-mail addresses. Could you please forward to me her exasperation at me trying to have massive pressure of thought in order to show how a miracle was made. I hope Dr Umeide simply thought he was doing me a favour by getting me right out of a group of Quakers and Buddhists who routinely dismiss the insights gained by making all seven of my prisoner friends into Bodhisattvas. If you read three letters to Bodhisattvas posts and my rain forest socialism blog, you can tell it is very obvious I am totally forgiving of Leon's drug dealing past, for example. That is what inspires the prisoners to forgive, too. I did not realise I was so enlightened while on drugs designed to make masochism as difficult as possible in order for you to apparently relish the burn out phase which is the worst possible state a psychotic can be in. Bastard Dr Umeide who will only be able to complain to the Cambian Hospital authorities when I really go to town at him for failing to take me up on my offer to make Salford the finest mental health trust in all universes. Nottingham is going to be where I stay exceptionally well behaved no matter what the idiocy because a single spell of enforced tranquil abiding meditation could have transformed Steven Pugh and Brian Horsefield into full blown messiahs.

Quakers and Buddhists have been totally blind to my spiritual advancement because they refuse to read them with the concentration Leon evidently had in solitary in Wabash Valley. These last very pressured writings in the I NEED a Miracle thread, where all these posts have been put up, are abominable for a free person to read who has not much time or effort to put into reading them, but can you please offer Equal Justice Initiative $500 by PayPal for a lawyer to read all my Icarus Project posts and get them printed and posted to as many death row inmates as possible?

Can you also offer Barbara Brooks $500 to publish a couple of pages in The Advocate of Barbara's summary of my Icarus project posts plus I would like to buy at least a half page advertisement for the Salford Green Party?

Can both groups ask any prisoners who can't afford a television to get in touch as I intend to do major fundraising through churches to find the people who will at first send books to start a correspondence before they apply to the Quaker Homeless jihadist bank account for the generosity gift with which to purchase it. I also want to get round gm labelling laws by mailing cakes and purchasing Bombay mix from India which is obviously gm free. I might even arrange for our local Kellogg's factory to make triple packs of thirty cm by thirty cm by ten cm boxes of Salford Green Party Kellogg's corn flakes with either a picture of Ordsall Hall, where the first pre-meeting of the Salford Green Party took place on September 13, 2015 or a picture of a Lowry painting plus news of recently released prisoners.

You are very bad at acknowledging my gifts and presenting me with proper accounts. That was $900 for your landlord, $1,500 for Leon's expences and $600 to print and post my Icarus project posts.
Last edited by oregonjunco on Sep 13, 2017 6:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Posts: 230
Joined: Jan 22, 2015 11:21 pm

Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Sep 05, 2017 7:28 pm

This is the first document written on my own computer, mostly between the hours of midnight and six am, when I am at my most alert. It has been up to a truly delightful bodhisattva by the name of Damian who is delighted his new CPN has managed to get him an interview with a supported housing scheme within days, when his old CPN had been procrastinating for months -- to finally show me how to configure my decrepit mobile phone to act as a Wi Fi hotspot. I have now got a limited connection to the internet in my room. I hope he does well with his superb trousers that are decorated with numerous square rings.
Anyway I wrote this nearly a couple of weeks ago when I thought I had a chance of getting the old Dr Logan Naidhu to actually take a history. I spent all night preparing for what I thought would be my interview with him but it never came. I had a brief conversation where I thought the most tactful response to this total idiocy of trying to get me to take Sodium Valproate in liquid form was to simply lie on the floor, in other words to imitate Vimalakirti's thunderous silence when asked by Manjushri to explain the dharma door to none duality after many arahats and bodhisattvas had given long explanations.
On that day I could not sleep at all and would have welcomed some haloperidol to vandalise my brain, but give a damn good anti-hangover when I come off it. Last night I had got up in time for breakfast at about 8pm and felt extraordinarily well enough to start work on the internet computer in the lounge on some e-mails I was writing to Harvey Gillman, who used to work for outreach for national Quakers when at about 11am they told me it would be ward round tomorrow. I panicked and wanted the five folders of documents I wanted to post to my own mother and godmother photocopied. Amy Bradley and another nurse promised to do it for me. Amy did at least photocopy the four pages that were missing from previous photocopies but after tea I was feeling tired enough to retire to bed at 6pm.
I then wrote an e-mail to the advocate, Danielle at advent advocacy begging her to bring in print outs of my latest e-mails and Icarus project posts so I could demonstrate exactly what I have been up to during my superpsychotic episodes, which I insist happen nearly every time I use a keyboard. I went back to bed at 7:15pm but then got up for supper of four Weetabix with milk and two quarter tuna sandwiches. I returned to the keyboard until midnight and then failed to get any sleep. I asked for a mug of hot chocolate at 3am but only grabbed a couple of hours sleep after 5:15am. After breakfast I decided to do a long spell of universe mending with staff. I had prepared two bags, one with my basic universe mending gear of mostly my computer printouts and another heavy bag of books with "Kingdom of Ife: West African Sculptures" on top. Because the new doctor was called Dr Khan and was a Muslim I included nine of my books about Islam. I did ask him to recommend which book he thought I ought to read first, but he showed no interest in much aspect of spirituality.
However I did wrest some important concessions. First I am to go on a shopping trip for shoes and a printer for my computer. Second they are going to see if I can see a Catholic priest and make contact with local Quakers. I am also expecting help in telephoning my Aunty Audrey Hewitt for my cousin's e-mail address or mobile phone number. Of course, if I get a printer I can start sending letters to people. I have, after all, just resurrected my address book out of thin air. I tried to show them the address book and claim a miracle but they don't seem to have a clue what I am talking about.
I thought I would be tired and needing to go to bed before now considering I only had two hours sleep last night. However whenever I have a setback my response is always to try to go higher still. I had difficulty talking to one of the nurses just now as I have developed quite crippling pressure of speech. I expect pressure of thought, but pressure of speech is a more obvious symptom of hypomania, which I insist is a symptom of too much depots. The keep on giving me the depots because I display hypomanic symptoms. However can I get out of it? I can expect to see the advocate Danielle on Friday. I hope she reads the e-mails into which I am copying her. I had just been hoping to give my history so it will be obvious I am going manic as part of Zen mania, which is described in "Three Days More" on page 37 of Zen Flesh, Zen Bones. I insisted that this be read, and someone did take it away to photocopy, along with "Arresting the Stone Buddha" from page 59 of the same book which is a humorous tale about skilful means. The third document that was photocopied was my "First Manic Scripture, 1979." I can only hope they are enough to show them everything I need to tell them about Zen, but I would be far happier if they had actually allowed me to explain them.
I will just have to show them I can practice the perfection of patience, although how much longer do I have to go through this living crucifixion?
Posts: 230
Joined: Jan 22, 2015 11:21 pm

Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Sep 05, 2017 7:40 pm

15 August 2017
To Dr Logan Naidu

I must explain the Zen principle of working to an impossible deadline.

THE FIRST READING Page 37 of Zen Flesh, Zen Bones by Paul Rep Three Days More

I also need to explain the Mahayana concept of Skilful Means or Skill in Liberative Technique

THE SECOND READING Page 59 of Zen Flesh, Zen Bones The Stone Buddha

I had an impossible deadline when I had my first two court cases

THE THIRD READING First Manic Scripture

Another impossible deadline was finding the rebirth of Vanessa Crummie, using what I knew of Buddhism plus a Catholic faith in the expediency of helping souls out of purgatory.
My solving the problem led to a superb elegant high while mountaineering in Austria, but when I picked up the Zen of Sangharakshita it led to many hypomanias being wrecked until I developed a superpsychosis through taking my fiancee on several twelve day trips to retreats by the London Buddhist Centre.

THE FOURTH READING The Water Hall Retreat Letter

The next impossible deadline was finding the rebirth of Di Chisholm.
I had a good superspychosis right from the start and used 297 consecutive nights of bondage to help me concentrate and meditate. I used the infant internet in 1998-9 to learn more and more about the appalling conditions prisoners were being held in in US prisons and exchanged letters with five.

THE FIFTH READING Saint Paul and the Angels, My second Short Letter to The Friend

That superspychosis led to the biggest elegant superspychosis of the lot. I came over a horizon and could see ALL universes. I was a complete novice on the Bronze Age Internet, but I knew I could rely on “Bodhisattvas more numberless than grains of sand in one hundred thousand River Ganges” as the White Lotus Sutra mentions.
I told the children in the street that I had discovered the atom bomb of compassion that could only be extinguished with a single drop of water, that being a twenty milligramme dose of haloperidol by injection.
I was exceptionally careful to be well behaved during that admission as I did not want them to suspect I was secreting ALL my medication. I knew it would be like daylight obscuring the Hubble Space Telescope. I could send out the complete history of all the cultures I had come across and could receive as thunderbolts the complete history of extra universal rain forests.
When my fiancee came and asked me what medication I was on I told her I was spitting out treble the dose of loxapine that had made it impossible to even type on a computer when I had experience of using it to deliberately vandalise a hypomania that was preventing me from sleeping. She warned me that if I refused the medication they might put me on depots SO SHE TOLD STAFF I HAD NOT BEEN TAKING MY MEDICATION. I said in a loud voice that if they put me on depots my life would not be worth living and I would jump off the motorway bridge next to the hospital at the first opportunity. I was serious about a life without the Bronze Age Internet.
You can read a few of my posts around this time in a thread called
SIXTH READINGS Mending All Universes and First Short Letter to The Friend

I have always craved a safe place to go hypomanic. I am hoping I can persuade you to prescribe medication only to punish me for being naughty, which I will object to and ask for time out in my room to settle, but it can be negotiated for me to take haloperidol as because I am aware that it is one of the nastiest but cheapest drugs in the armoury. I am on so much Clopixol that I don't think it will seriously touch me.
When I had a Mental Health Appeal Tribunal in about October last year I craved the anti-hangover it gives you and asked for a much P.R.N. as they could give me thirty hours before the tribunal. At first they would only give me 500mg of sodium Valproate which I wanted to secrete as it causes me to become completely sterile. (On Saturday I was still sterile although I have not taken it since about March.) Then I thought I had persuaded Dr Umeide he could not bribe me by denying me my escorted leave. I would not take it.
I even have proof that it totally wrecked an elegant hypomania as I had three “Quaker highs” when I first got to Brook House in September 2007, within an easy bus ride from Central Manchester Quakers and The Friends Library. The main letter I wrote at the time I sent to a friend who was a Catholic priest who had studied Zen, but he never kept his copy to return to me.
During this time I was making good progress ending up by actually applying for membership of the Quakers, which was a huge step for me. I had two highs where I was rather disinhibited but they passed within forty eight hours, so I thought I had finally arrived at my goal, to be manic in private in the community. I had not got my computer then so I wrote two handwritten letters to Dr Wier and he returned them to me to type up afterwards. I insist that the real contents of my mind when I am manic are my writings, rather than my presentation which always appears to be naughty when people refuse to take a history.
Unfortunately they discovered I had been secreting all my Sodium Valproate so they gave it to me and it totally wrecked my superspychosis until February 2015.
You can read about this February 2015 superspychosis when I was working to the deadline that I was hoping to find a kink who would give me bondage, which, apart from Chris Drinkwater and police bringing me into hospital in handcuffs I had been unable to access since my wife's death in 2006.
SEVENTH READING Letter to Waxgirl
That high rather burned itself out when a sadist called cleric thought I was quite out of order to ask a stranger for bondage. I was far more scared of meeting anyone in a pub than any scenario in a bedroom or dungeon because the clopixol was totally socially crippling me.
But my present superspychosis got well and truly started shortly before getting “The Letter That Cured me of Schizophrenia”
EIGHTH READINGS Testimonial from Leon, Superb Letter from Leon Benson, Letters From My September 2015 Spiritual Awakening
SUPERPSYCHOSIS The exalted state that follows a psychosis once it has matured.
Prison – Peter Hewitt Department of Generosity and Awareness
Punishment by being asked to stay in my room. TEMPORARY solitary confinement
A Learning Bodhisattva
Rehabilitation – Di Chisholm Department of Wisdom and Compassion
Getting nurses and patients to read and comment on my writings. Writing to prisoners in USA.
A Teaching Bodhisattva
I DO NOT WANT ANY DRUGS TO MAKE ME BETTER BY BUGGERING UP CHEMICAL RECEPTORS IN THE BRAIN. It is a miracle I am as superspychotic as I am on 600mg of clopixol per week.
You will see miracles once you abandon depots or continuous medication. Just use medication to punish me for being naughty. Please punish me for being naughty by confining me to my room. If I am deemed to be very naughty I would prefer to be punished with a stat dose of PRN haloperidol e.g.30mg.
You will see MIRACLES. These are some miracles that have already happened. On 24 August Kevin Corcoran (I don't know how to give him a big enough bollocking) and Dr Williams (who I once wrote would do a better job as a psychiatrist after he had been chopped up into dog meat.) saw me put seven books, a Quaker Quest leaflet and a computer mouse in a strong green Quality Save Bag and then put it in one of my six forty litre strong shopping bags full of universe mending gear. We took them to Meadowbrook on Eagleton Ward before I put on a blindfold to be better able to meditate in order to give the type of history I am only now capable of now giving.
Five of these shopping bags of universe mending gear disappeared from room 4 because no member of staff remembered my exhilaration sitting on the bed with a blindfold on surrounded by my six bags of universe mending gear.
On January 6, 2017 Kevin Cocoran returned me to the land of my friends by bringing my 2015 LOMA and my main address book WHICH I HAD BEEN CERTAIN HAD LAST BEEN SEEN IN ROOM 4 and brought my mail in a green Aldi shopping bag which was with me in room 4.
On 29 March when I went home for the first time four bags of universe mending gear were around my chair. F*****g b*****d Kevin Corcoran still feigns complete ignorance of the fact these were returned home by Schroedinger's cat miracle i.e. they were both at home where they needed to be and in the hospital, where it would have been convenient for me but until a staff member had actually observed them in room 4 AND HAD TAKEN THE HISTORY I risked 1,200mg per fortnight of clopixol to have taken, the five bags of universe mending kit weren't in room 4 at all. They had literally disappeared down a black hole I seem to be able to create any time something vital goes missing, like the hard drives of my computers and its back up discs until I have learned my lesson.
Fortunately between 23 June and 3 August this green bag reappeared on the settee including my library copy of the Vimalakirti Sutra, my Qur'an and my Zen Flesh, Zen Bones.
Between 30 March and 20 June my universe mending kit I had prepared for Chris Drinkwater miraculously reappeared next to my chair.
I had wanted to tell the doctor who should have come and taken my history my mental health was the best it has ever been on depots. On the previous Wednesday 17 August I had gone really high as I had a deadline to meet. I had been thinking of how to make Salford Green Party more compatible with Buddhist and Quaker values and I wanted to be elected the membership secretary so I could personally see that all members who had put down they wanted to canvas got some training from experienced canvassers. I wanted to build a wise and compassionate society by building a wise and compassionate membership but I went really high after getting a Muslim helper of John Ray read to my from the Spider Sura of the Glorious Qur'an 29 v30-44. I told her I knew the fifth ethical training precept of Buddhism renounces the use of substances which affect mindfulness and I knew the Christian rule that one should love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and all your strength. Mark 12:30 I told her I wanted to find the bit in the Qur'an that said I should not take my medication. She told me the Qur'an says you should take your medication to keep you well. I did not realise till later that verse 41 actually says that Western psychiatry is a spider's house for they take protectors other than Allah.
As I went high I came to the conclusion that all aspects of the economy could be transformed into a dana economy so beloved of Buddhists by seeking rich people to pay zakat to Salford Green Party Bank accounts allied to every business to fund their charitable aims. I want Area Quaker Meeting to facilitate a bank account at Mount Street to pay homeless people the “26 pounds so I can stay in a Premier Inn rather than £22 so I can stay in the Salvation Army and get all my stuff nicked,” as a homeless man succinctly put it, so they can afford to come to a revamped Wednesday programme at Mount Street of training in how to do “sunbathing without the sun” and thus be wandering homeless lay monks rather than just beggars. Half the money raised by the homeless Quaker Jihad would go to people in US who are homeless because their only home is a prison.
The wealthiest tax dodgers would be encouraged to pay Zakat to any Salford Green Party Bank account that takes their fancy. It takes the redistribution of wealth right out of the hands of the tax man.
I wanted Christian churches to publish a list of members and attenders, like the Quakers do, and finance the ordinary working of the parish and diocese by getting members to pay a standing order. Then the collection in the church could be more along the lines of a “This Week's Collection” as at Quakers where someone has to make an impassioned plea for funds for a particular charity.
The churches could even set up Salford Green Party bank accounts to support something like a credit union, except that all deposits are generosity deposits in that they are expected to be gifts to the less fortunate, who can take out generosity gifts. These are interest free gifts that have only a moral responsibility to pay back in when it can be afforded to give more money back to the needy. If the priest could be given access to the full electoral register then they could vouch for the people applying for generosity gifts. It would be useful if anyone who is a member of a church can rely on a £200 credit if one has a crisis.
This idea would lead to INFINITE People's Quantitative easing as money is thrown from the wealthiest at the poorest by giving them generosity grants. It would not cause the inflation of property and stock market prices of ordinary quantitative easing.
I had also finally done a complete archaeological excavation of the piles of paper on my two dining room tables and discovered that my passport and the document telling me who were the people who did my Managers' Review had literally disappeared into thin air. Before I had developed the idea for the INFINITE Meeting for Worship or Quaker Quantum Mechanics I postulated that I must be able to destroy the entire universe and recreate it, minus one thing that is important to me. Thus I should be able to screw up the navigation systems of any nuclear weapon fired in anger. It is not necessarily me but beings among the heavenly company of universe menders. This is what is meant by “The Lord Will Provide.” So my first thought was to write to Caroline Lucas to ask her to find some Tory MP to bring in a bill to finance Trident by PFI with the payments going to the Salford Green Party Bank in the unlikely event that the weapons are shown to be completely unusable.
Anyway all this speculation while on clopixol was absolutely exhausting and I collapsed into burn out, which is the state drugs are designed to cause. I had completely ran out of the neurochemicals necessary to make me feel really well. I was a complete shambles at the meeting and I desperately sat in a blindfold and toe clip strap in order to do my “sunbathing without the sun.” I arrived an hour early for the meeting trying desperately to recover some energy through meditation. When the first three people arrived they ignored me and talked among themselves. Then our election agent, David Jones hurt me far more than if he had thrown boiling water in my face by saying as soon as he came in, “This isn't a bordello. Take that thing off or you'll be barred from all future meetings.” I wanted to talk to someone about my messianic vision but I felt I could not do that without being as submissive as possible, which meant either blindfold or bondage. I made a complete hash of my bid for membership secretary and wanted someone to take me to their home and take a history. I am only writing this history now.
I had warned Wendy Olsen that this was the closest I had come to being admitted to mental hospital since 2006 but I did not think I needed to explain that that was because I had burned out of a good superpsychosis following organising the funeral of my wife and then attending the funeral of my father but then felt friendless and lonely at home on my own and I craved bondage as that always used to enable me to sunbath without the sun. I don't remember what naughtiness got me put in seclusion but by the time I came out they had decided to put me on depots even though I expected that to prevent me acquiring a superpsychosis. In other words 2006 was a disaster which I was only recovering from by getting deeply involved in electoral politics. I am quite confident I know how to get elected as an independent Rain Forest Socialist candidate for Walkden South.
I did get to sleep that night. The next day I was determined to use Enforced Tranquil Abiding first at Simon Moule's, whose mother lives in Nottingham, and then at Paul Oldfield's. Simon suggested coming to the Ch'an meditation class at Mount Street and I am delighted I did. I did the best meditation in a class in my life. I could transfer easily from a supermanic conversation with myself to pure sunbathing without the sun, in at least the first dhayana. I called it my Pendle Hill meditation as I realised that sunbathing without the sun would be exceedingly useful to all mental patients. I had a superbly elegant superpsychosis within a day of being dangerously burnt out.

20 August Since writing this several things have happened. Dr Naidu has left without even CONSIDERING whether a history NEEDS to be taken. I was taught over three and a half years at medical school and at every single admission have been looking for a safe place to go high. This place looks as though it would be ideal.
When Dr Umeide referred me here I assume one of the reasons was my intractable problems with both the local Quakers, including even my old overseer, Chris Green, and the local Green Party especially Wendy Olsen. It is from her that I have learned all the political skills necessary to get a good showing trying to get elected as a Rain Forest Socialist candidate as I will have to call it until I am actually reinstated in the Green Party of England and Wales. I would prefer to use the name Salford Green Party to demonstrate that the political ideas come from deciding that the people in Salford Green Party, like Chris Bertenshaw and Emma Van Dyke who both stood for parliament in the 2015 election were worth dying for.
Ever since Mother Mary Saint Theresa taught from Jesus' saying in the Luke 23:34 “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” I have been most impressed with Jesus' love for ones enemies. I call it “the most perfect of Christian virtues” in my letter to Jill Tweedie that I have published as “First Manic Scripture” on the Icarus Project pages under spirituality, where most of my posts have been posted. I wrote that letter literally hours after being discharged from hospital after an exceedingly mild case of Zen mania was wrecked completely with 12mg haloperidol per day. I felt it had just moved it into my subconscious but it had been maturing despite the medication.
Hours after writing that piece (and it is a miracle it survives) I became the genuine born again Christian. I was staying with my sister and brother-in-law at the time, but still used to enjoy going out into the streets to accost strangers and tell them the importance of loving one's enemies. I even went into a police station to suggest I go out on patrol with police to try to work out strategies based on love for ones enemies. They politely told me to write to the Chief Constable, which I never did!

In other words the mania had progressed but had not matured into a superpsychosis which is the end result of any psychosis left to mature. I am trying my hardest to get it to mature while still incarcerated as I want to turn this establishment INTO THE BEST MENTAL HEALTH ESTABLISHMENT IN ALL UNIVERSES. I kept telling that to staff at Meadowbrook but they never took me up on the offer. Medication is designed to prevent a psychosis from maturing. Even on medication I knew the importance of the written word on a computer because my 1999 Pentecostal experience had happened because I wrote first on Brandon Astor Jones behalf, and then to Patrick Swiney who was a celebratory innocent. As you can tell from my web page
NINTH READING From a Heavenly Bodhisattva, Patrick Swiney
He thoroughly enjoyed the bundle of documents I sent him and it made his day. I can transmit an elegant hypomania to almost every prisoner to whom I write. I then started to write to Thomas Lowe, who was a political prisoner in the War on Drugs in that he got about six years for growing his own cannabis to control his Krohn's disease.
But then the most valuable of all my friendships developed with
TENTH READING From a Brutal Murderer Bodhisattva, Floyd Bailey
His first two letters of 22 October and 19 November I now realise were him going straight into the elegant form of hypomania or superpsychosis. He was transferred to Pelican Bay Prison, California's most inhuman solitary confinement prison but I lost touch with him till December 2015. He wrote me a couple of subdued letters on 5 February and 9 March 2016 and then went absolutely ecstatic when he had received a TELEVISION from me before 16 May. That was mania, rather than hypomania! And because he knows how to handle himself he escaped medication. He was so impressed with this “generosity bodhisattva” as I called myself in one of my letters to him telling him under no circumstances did I want him to pay me back – that he has written me FIVE letters since my own incarceration despite the fact I could only send him books until I finally got access to INFINITE PHOTOCOPYING. If you only have time to read one of my Icarus Project posts then please read this one.
The letter that I most needed at the Mental Health Appeal that I lost was called ELEVENTH READING INFINITE PSYCHOSIS AND MESSIAHHOOD FOR ALL I first wrote the main letter for a Mental Health Appeal where they rubbished the idea that my normal mental health is superpsychotic and that I only need to come off drugs eventually to prove it. Well in 1994 the superpsychosis was quite subdued in the “Letter to Water Hall.” I actually went high on another retreat at Water Hall in August 1994. But it is dangerous in the extreme to show any sign of superpsychosis in mental hospital as you can read in my detailed post, the second one. That was written before my Messianic vision that I should be able to lead anyone to nirvana using just Christ's forgiveness as embodied by me. The last two letters were written when my superpsychosis that had led to my admission had not finally petered out. That was to come when they finally forced me to take LIQUID sodium valproate. Which is why I so urgently need to see a doctor who will take my history before I am forced to show that any filth you put in me is not going to make any difference to my messianic vision as was the case with my great prisoner hero, George Fox himself.
21 August about 4:40am I have got up because I am afraid my efforts to teach about my superpsychosis may fizzle out because my brain will be running out of the neuroreceptors necessary to have a tremendous feeling of well being. That is why I call the second thread about my mental illness under Madness and Extreme States “Miserable (not) and Manic, As I explain in that post I usually feel so downright rotten in the morning I do not even consider writing on my computer till after seven O'clock at night. Last night I went to bed at 2am but did not get up till about to miss my lunch at 12 O'clock. I did feel extraordinarily well although my blood pressure was so low I nearly collapsed four times over lunch. My standing BP was 74/61mmHg. I spent the day mostly in bed praying rather than meditating, particularly ruminating over whether I could convince someone to take a history and then try my ideal treatment, a large dose of haloperidol every time we agree I have been naughty and no maintenance medication at all. You will literally see miracles happen.
It is because I have a love that is equally distributed to all subatomic particles in ALL universes that I have such a reputation among bodhisattvas as a universe mender.
Posts: 230
Joined: Jan 22, 2015 11:21 pm

Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Sep 13, 2017 6:17 pm

Sent 1:05 9 September, 2017 to Nottingham Quakers

Edward Sellman replied with the weekly bulletin which includes notice of a Quaker Green Day in Bakewell 7 October
an all day meeting at Mansfield including a play about a Chechen refugee on 8 October
an Area Meeting Quiet day at Bakewell on 4 November
and a Woodbrooke on the road workshop "Empowering Friends for Service followed by the Area meeting on 11 November at Nottingham.
I have discovered my nearest meeting is Belper meeting, which is at Fritchley about seven miles away.

I have been brutally transferred from Meadowbrook Hospital in Salford to
Storthfield House
Storth Lane
South Normanton
Derbyshire DE55 3AA
I was having many problems with my local area, especially with Green Party target to win in Irwell Riverside Ward and parliamentary candidate for Salford and Eccles who has become clerk to Eccles local meeting, which was a thousand yards from my ward.
I have been having Zen experiences since the age of three and I have recently began to remember my first taste of George Fox 1652 Mahayana nirvana when I was punished by my mother for eating the delicious mason wasps and red ants that nested in the skirting board of our dining room in Ife, Nigeria in 1958. I feel I must have been taught meeting for worship by Thurston Shaw the great white Ibo archaeologist and anthropologist who first excavated the finds at Igbo Ukwu, a previously unknown copper smithing and brass casting civilisation from the tenth century.
The Dalai Lama noticed from the audience my peak experience from 1959 and told me it was Vajrayana initiation FROM AN ANIMAL.
I could tell you much more but could do with people reading my posts on the Icarus Project Forums. Most of my posts are under spirituality and many relate to my ministry to long term prisoners in USA. I am just waiting for sufficient photocopying to launch my Salford Green Party Revolution in America's prisons, but I am a sectioned patient being treated for my Messianic vision with the worst drugs in the pharma repertoire.
I desperately need an overseer who can read my posts and guide me as to the best way to use them.
I have two friends in Nottingham, Bertram Karrasch and Angela Khallisch and also my cousin lives in

Catherine Hewitt,
29 Dale Lane,
Nottingham NG9 4EH
I have e-mailed Bertram but got no reply. But I can't write to Catherine until I get occupational therapy to find some way to print any documents from my computer. I have my own computer, but I only yesterday connected it to the internet using my mobile phone. But it took over thirty minutes just to post two documents to the Icarus Project.
My username is oregonjunco
Please can you read my From a Brutal Murderer Bodhisattva, Floyd Bailey
and page 2
to whom I have been writing since 1998 and also From a Heavenly Bodhisattva, Patrick Swiney.
who I also wrote to in 1998 but is now a saint who has resurrected my address book back to me for the second time.
This is the e-mails I prepared for my mental health appeal tribunal but nobody read:
Infinite Psychosis and Messiahhood for All
Please arrange for me to have an overseer. I would appreciate the e-mail addresses of people who want to read these posts.
I feel that George Fox's vision was the infinite psychosis of someone whose messianic vision remains undimmed by repeated spells in seventeenth century squalor of the gaols he was repeatedly put in. Today if one ever believes one is a children of God one gets the living crucifixion of drugs or long sentences in US prisons.
Last edited by oregonjunco on Sep 13, 2017 6:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Posts: 230
Joined: Jan 22, 2015 11:21 pm

Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Sep 13, 2017 6:30 pm

I posted this to the Sheffield Buddhist Centre and my Manchester Buddhist Centre contacts at 14 minutes past midnight this morning, Wednesday 13 September. I desperately NEED someone to talk with about my many spiritual problems, particularly how to get a sea change in staff's awareness of me by treating me as a bodhisattva, rather than a deluded schizophrenic. I believe that schizophrenia, when left to itself will always mature into some superpsychotic state where the person becomes happy with their altered consciousness and can move on. That is why schizophrenia is not the disabling illness in third world countries without access to drugs. I have come across a relatives' group in Bangalore called AMEND. Their first aim is to get mental illness classed as a disability for the purposes of disability social security, but their second aim is to get clozapine to be made available in India!

I have been coming to the Manchester Buddhist Centre for thirty eight years but have been able to find enlightenment virtually without any sangha. According to a natural tutorial from the Dalai Lama on 19 July 1996 one of my earliest memories was VAJRAYANA INITIATION FROM AN ANIMAL. After that I started to send my thunderbolts into the BBC Philharmonic Orchestra as to perform classical music to professional standard demands one has reached the tenth bhumi, according to Sangharakshita's Wisdom Beyond Words. When I receive my thunderbolts I am often quite manic with excitement. This has ALWAYS been treated absolutely disastrously with drugs to affect mindfulness. I only make a recovery when I finally come off drugs, but my talking of having found the resurrection of at least two friends who committed suicide is regarded as evidence of schizophrenia.
My meditation practice is Zen, which I must have picked up in my previous rebirth as it must have come from my father's Oxbridge education and his excavations of the naturalistic brass and terra cotta heads of the ancient kingdom of Ife, Nigeria. I was probably taught Quaker Meeting for Worship by Thurston Shaw as I can remember Samadhi when my mother used to put me in the playpen when I was three. "As the bee collects honey from different flowers so the wise man accepts the essence of different scriptures always finding the good in all religions" Srimad Bhagavatan, quoted in "The Perennial Philosophy by Aldous Huxley.
I strongly disagree with Sanghrakshita's critique of Christianity. I have always ben impressed with his love for his enemies and I first experienced the Christian version of nirvana in 1979, shortly before attending the Manchester Buddhist Centre for the first time. I w as fired by Jesus quest for social justice and was not impressed with the line that if you meditate on the breath you can become nice and calm and peaceful like us. it was three years later I discovered the mettabhavana and came back. I practiced it solidly in order to find the rebirth of a friend who had killed herself. As in my Zen I discovered it in just the nick of time as I was about to lead the biggest North face in Austria as only my fourth lead of an ice climb! I feel I had liberated her into Samyak Annaturra Sambodhi. I most closely feel like an incarnation of Ksitigarbha as I much prefer the company of murderers and other criminals to Buddhists who insist I am not even allowed to go on the beginner retreats any more because I asked could I please wear a blindfold one eventful week in which my Zen as maturing like crazy and I discovered the Jai Siripongs Crusade to help death row inmates to be as unafraid of death as this executed Thai ex-Buddhist monk. I also was receiving tutorials from the Dalai Lama telling me that the bodhisattva ideal was already present in the Bonnist religion of Tibet before Padmasambhava came.
On March 30, 1999 I came over a horizon and instead of getting a thunderbolt as bright as the sun I saw a vision of bodhisattvas more numerous than grains of sand in the River Ganges. I did not expect the MBC to helps so I went to Central Manchester Quakers but I was so choked with emotion that they just assumed I was mentally ill and ignored me until my wife died because of the medication I was on and after her funeral Chris Green showed me what a Quaker overseer was meant to be. I did not join the Quakers until 2008 but feel their meditation practice is far more inclusive than the Sangharakshita fan club. I would like to forward some e-mails with my story on my web pages
Here is one
It is called letter from my first meditation teacher 17 July 2016
I describe how I had mastered pain sadomasochism without even realising it. The second letter is the long one I wrote to Arthaketu asking to become a Quaker mitra. No one has responded to either. The third letter is one I wrote to Water Hall retreat team before I had withdrawn from the drugs but was going superpsychotic anyway. I am now far more superpsychotic than I have ever been. All psychoses will mature into a superpsychosis if left to mature rather than forced through chemical means to become subpsychotic or normopathic.
I desperately NEED a sangha.
Please can you send somebody to visit me in
Steven Wilett
Storthfield House
Storth Lane
South Normanton
Derbyshire DE55 3AA
My mobile number is 07530 366 961 but the ee signal here is diabolical and I will probably have to ring you back on a missed call.
I have no visitors at all. I have not even managed to see a Catholic priest yet despite asking repeatedly for the last five weeks. It is a rehabilitation hospital for the mentally ill.
Posts: 230
Joined: Jan 22, 2015 11:21 pm

Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Sep 21, 2017 3:34 pm

Please recommend a local solicitor

I have just written this this last couple of days (20 and 21 September 2017) to try to get my ideas together for a lawyer to help me in my ultimate aim. To organise my stay in this hospital as if it were a prison in a purgatory realm where one needs to discover how the Bronze Age Internet works before you can be granted your freedom. In other words I want to turn this establishment into the finest Salford Green Party Prison in all universes.

I wrote this originally to my solicitor, Robert Lizar who has an impressive human rights record as well as being outstanding in mental health. I called him "My solicitor who got someone out of Guantanamo Bay!" But recently he has been trying to defend me without having let me explain anything of my messianic vision to him. I intend to ask my new solicitor to read some books on Zen and Buddhism and Quakerism before she can represent me.

I have been working myself into a full blown Zen mania, like the one when I was preparing for my Mental health appeal tribunal because they were giving me a new managers review without me having anyone at all as an advocate. Amy Bradley the mental health act compliance officer, whom I trust, has recommended Margaret Houdmont of MHAT Legal in Mansfield and Hazel Montgomery of Cartwright King Solicitors in Derby. Can you please recommend either of them to me?

I was writing a pretty complete statement of my psychiatric predicament for my solicitors. I cannot see how to get myself defended without someone having at least a basic understanding of the principles of both Zen, which may not necessarily have anything to do with Buddhism and also about both Mahayana Buddhism and the bodhisattva ideal and Vajrayana Buddhism and the world's Infinite joke. It would also help if my solicitor was familiar with Quaker meeting for worship and Quaker Meeting for Worship for business. At least be familiar with "Advices and Queries" and the testimonies. I have a positive surfeit of written material to support my quest, but I need to pay this solicitor to do at least a five hundred pounds worth of reading and writing for me to have any chance of defending me in any way other than the criminally incompetent way that Robert Lizar did in 1999 and 2016. I have just added this last paragraph before sending what I have written already as I intend to continue writing this article until it becomes a major statement of my position, like my last post on the
From a Heavenly Bodhisattva, Patrick Swiney thread
or the post I actually wrote on my own computer to Dr Naidhu in my
I Finally Just Need a History to be Taken
I have received news yesterday that Leon Benson has lost his appeal against losing a post conviction relief appeal in the Supreme Court of Indiana. This is a major setback. I have dedicated most of my hard saving to fighting these appeals for him. It cost me over $20,500 to fund the original appeal and $13,600 to fund the appeal to the supreme court. I could do with spending a similar amount paying a lawyer in probably Mansfield to argue that Robert Lizar's defence of me was lacking in any attempt to find out what my messianic vision is all about. I literally believe that all psychosis can be matured into a messiahhood for all if left to mature rather than vandalised with drugs designed to prevent a psychosis from maturing. The more my psychosis has matured, the more determined are staff to tell the reports that I have no insight into my mental illness. That statement just proves they have no insight whatsoever into my mental health, which considering all the filth I am putting up with is not only excellent but as outstanding as the mental health of Albert Einstein or Nelson Mandela.
Please can you read Leon Benson' story and if you like I would be thrilled if you actually joined the Icarus project and posted a reply of some words of encouragement for Leon after losing all three of his appeals but being absolutely certain of his innocence.
Superb Letter from Leon Benson

If you could have just asked for an adjournment (This is crazy. I had written a longer post on my mobile phone but wanted to finish it on the big computer. When I opened it on the big computer only this first paragraph was on the main computer. As I started to copy it from my mobile phone the screen went blank and then replaced the draft with just the first phrase of the copied e-mail. I shall now have to start all over again.)

If you could have just asked for an adjournment when I kept saying "I had just 105 things I wanted to say" then maybe I should have appealed for an adjournment of the case so I could give them something of my none fully enlightened paranoid schizophrenic persona whose purpose is to scare the shit out of somebody who has no idea of the vicissitudes of the psychiatric paradox.
Could you not tell that it was only because no one gave me any opportunity to give my history that I ended up mock assassinating the chair of the tribunal by stabbing him with a loosely held mouth organ, not even the one with a sharp corner but the one with the rounded end, (by stroke of fortune.) I feel that is a stroke of pure genius in illustrating how to set up a Zen koan out of any extreme situation.
I am much better at organising myself under extremely stressful situations, like the saga of T.F. threatening to kill me, smash my fucking computer up and he did smash TWO of my drinking flasks up and my radio and even nearly kicked S.C. to death with his steel toe capped boots. (How come he is allowed steel toe capped boots when I had my trainers taken off me for over six weeks because I had kicked someone who came in to commit world war three on my persona with an injection of depot without any compensating universe mending to compensate for the devastation done in imaginary and negative universes? Eventually they wanted to give me Frusemide to control the side effects of not getting my podiatry appointment rearranged till July 2017.)
I had been hoping you would have recognised my quick change from just two minutes of meditation but when I tried to show it you in the dining room you kept on rushing me as though preparing the meditational state for a tribunal were not more important than the rest of the none-preparation you claim falsely to have done on my behalf.
When I insisted on having my tribunal televised to California I expected you to at least enquire WHY I wanted such an outrageous claim and not simply to tell me it could not be done. I thought I had finally cracked how to win the money lenders in the temple argument by explaining the theory of the infinite meeting for worship and Quaker Quantum mechanics but I had spent the whole of the second meeting with you trying to bring up at least the theory of the four classes of Einsteinian universes with positive, negative, imaginary and negative imaginary universes which would lend some credence to the fact it was claimed I had said I was more brilliant than Einstein.
My theory that it is only pharasaical eldering which causes ALL the problems with a universe that appears to have only one dimension of time but that may be only our limited understanding of same. Perhaps Maitreya will guide us all into multidimensional time with Bernadette of Lourdes miracles to rewrite the quantum mechanics history of the universe done for all our healing miracles, such as mending our high carbon dioxide oceans or refreezing the Arctic Ice sheet or mending our rain forests. (We will have to replant all the palm oil plantations and soya bean fields first.)

If one imagines that when one gets to Hell it is a prison similar to the dreadful contraptions called department of corrections when they should by rights be called Departments of Idiocy but the regime will be similar to the extra cushy regime here, where I have a library of over 147 books in my room including most of the books on Buddhism I have already read once and want to reread or use as references plus many books I want to read. I also have a digital radio CD player (but only six BBC Music Magazine CDs) that I can listen to in my room all day and night if I want. I can listen to BBC Radio 3, 4, 4 extra, the BBC World Service or even Classic FM. These radio stations should be the minimum available in every SHU programme in USA. During the night I am checked on in my room and can engage in conversation about my spiritual progress. I can even ask for flasks of hot chocolate or snacks of cheese and crackers and chocolate spread and have chocolate and biscuits purchased from the local shops. In other words considering I have not earned any privileges yet of things like escorted or UNESCORTED leave it is the ideal rehabilitation prison, similar to the cushy conditions in Scandinavian prisons. I even have ever so precious internet access on the ward computer.
The get tough on crime Orange County voters would undoubtedly think it was unfair they should land in prison, but it is the essential university where you will need a very thorough grounding in advanced Buddhism or at least an appreciation of the paranirvana of Jesus Christ (his resurrection body) in order for it to be safe to have access to the natural internet of everyone's deepest secrets. Confidentiality so they can prevent me naming any patients or even staff in my e-mails is a load of crap. They just want to prevent any solidarity between anyone caught up in the pharasaical eldering of a mental hospital dispute and anyone in the free world at all. I would like to insist on my freedom of speech as a journalist rather than being told the European Convention on Human Rights, as well as giving freedom of speech also gives a right to privacy.
They must realise it is much easier to cope with any prison sentence if you forgive the people who put you there. Floyd Bailey has more than once said that when he wakes up he knows because of the totally stupid murder he did why he is in there. but a celly who got a twenty five year to life sentence for shoplifting a bottle of whisky is just going to get more and more bitter.
In his The Book of Joy a set of interviews between the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu Desmond Tutu talks of heaven being a place of infinite beauty as God's splendour unfolds. The Dalai Lama said he might prefer Hell as there would be people to whom he can spread compassion, which is the basis of human happiness. I am certainly happy in the Hell like state of extreme psychosis. This is because the Dalai Lama is one of the world's most expert Vajrayana Buddhists. It is the way of the thunderbolt. One postulates that nirvana can be seen in the samsara that is all around one and that leads to the infinite joke. If you are aware of the consequences of actions in ALL universes then the world really is a skilful place. Since getting the first two letters from Floyd Bailey
It is called "From a Brutal Murderer Bodhisattva, Floyd Bailey" 646 views and
On 12 October and 13 November, 1998 I have been fascinated with the proposal that a murderer has the opportunity to forgive the person he has killed and can thus achieve redemption form his sin. Floyd has certainly done that, but, because of the "Law of the Walls" which he describes in detail in his second letter he has ended up killing his celly at Mule Creek. I could do with asking him to go into ore detail in order for me to help him assuage his guilt over this deed. It is obvious to these three killers I have written to in California that I do not judge them for having killed someone. I have a love that is equally directed at every single being in all universes so you should expect me to be able to make friends with any killer.
I want to write to more on death row. Previously I thought it would be depressing writing to someone who is eventually killed, but now I feel ready for it. The purpose of the Jai Siripongs Crusade is to prepare prisoners for parole, regardless of what prison sentence they have. if someone can show they are totally unafraid of dying, like Jai Siripongs evidently was then even the warden at San Quentin said he deserved a reprieve in order to give the other inmates some hope.
Jai Siripongs was executed in 1999 for an armed robbery that went wrong at the convenience store where he had previously worked. Although he didn't fire the weapon he was caught with their credit cards and was charged with murder. He never betrayed his accomplice and was hardly defended by his public defender. It was John Wilmerding, a Quaker in Vermont, who ran the Campaign for Equitive Restorative Justice who sent out the alert to which I responded. Lil' Wildflower, the Cherokee founder of the California to Amend Three Strikes who added material saying his Geneva Convention rights were violated because the Thai embassy was not informed he had been arrested.
I started one of my best clemency pleas by saying that California had abrogated its right to kill prisoners by the Corcoran gladiatorial shootings and I quoted Senator Vescancellos' closing statement to the Corcoran Inquiry saying that a prisoner had over two hundred times the rate of being killed in a fight than the entire rest of the country's state prisons and the federal prisons, too. I then went on to quote most of the section in the Amnesty International Report on US prisons about ineffective counsel in death row cases. A prisoner in North Carolina called Coleman lost his chance to appeal a death sentence because his public defenders filed his appeal a day late! Floyd's pen friend, Linda Chiaconne responded by saying that it was Coleman's case where he was actually running a rehabilitation service from his cell was what spurred her into prison advocacy in the first place. Lil' Wildflower also responded to say she wanted to forward my clemency plea around and had sent it to some California newspapers.
Jai Siripongs had had some training as a Buddhist monk in Thailand before coming to California, so he spent his time on death row in meditation and painting beautiful watercolours which I saw online. In about 2002 I asked out loud by prayer, "What was the fourth dhayana?" I got a reply, presumably from the Dalai Lama as the only Vajrayana Buddhist I had met to say it was what Jai Siripongs had been doing all that time on death row. That means presumably that I have transmitted the basics of my prison work to the Dalai Lama!
There is a post script to this story. When I was trapped in seclusion in 2006 I wanted staff to find the copy of my Jai Siripongs plea I had put in my file to try to counter the story that it was the internet that had made me ill. It was the internet that had led me to sartori or Zen enlightenment. As I was ruing the fact that it seemed to have got lost I got a message from Jai Siripongs thanking me for writing the clemency plea but he actually had welcomed being executed as he felt it was an act of ritual suicide or hare kiri to atone for the disgrace of having introduced his accomplice to the shop. The report of his execution by some Quakers said he left this world in Meeting for Worship. Although it is almost impossible to follow the Theravada path to the enlightenment of an arahat, it very likely that anyone starting on the path will find the path of the bodhisattva and enter the deathless state, which Jai Siripongs had done, so he could either stay in enlightenment after death or choose any rebirth he wants.

When the new breed of paranoid schizophrenics get on the war path, (and it is mainly because of them that the security of mental hospitals has become so oppressive) I feel I have a golden opportunity to demonstrate to them that I am already higher and more totally fearless than anyone who has ever been on heroin or amphetamines can even postulate. I love it when they come out all guns blazing and I tell them they are a stupid cunt for allowing them to have an excuse for obstructing their psychosis which is what has caused them to be on the war path in the first place. I have particularly fond memories of outmanoeuvring S. O. a six foot six giant of a man I loved being able to go right up to his face to threaten. If he faltered at all then my speech would immediately become calm and conciliatory but when he raised his voice again mine would become threatening again. Eventually he was calm enough to return to bed and staff were amazed at the ease with which I maintained total control of the situation.
On another occasion he was shouting among a large group of staff in the corridor. It was difficult for me to control the situation because staff kept on exacerbating it. After he had been shouting at me, he turned to shout at the rest of the staff and I curled up in a ball on the floor to indicate submissiveness. When he turned round again to have another go at shouting at me he saw me on the floor, burst out laughing and then immediately apologised to the staff for the stupid pointless argument, even though it had probably been started by staff.
I am at my most alert between the hours of midnight, when this computer in the lounge is switched off, and six am when it is possible to go into the dayroom again and have breakfast. I have read three books so far, mostly in the early hours of the morning. I have only used my half an hour of two to one escorted leave to go to the local convenience store once since getting here and I have not ben able to make contact with either of my four friends in Nottingham yet. I was told it was a rehabilitation service so I should be able to make new friends in the area. I have exchanged e-mails with Edward Sellman of Nottingham Quakers twice, but in the second one he says he has already been contacted by Manchester Quakers and they intend to send someone to visit me. Nobody from Manchester apart from Chris Green and Branwen McHugh has even written to me or answered their e-mails. (I tell a lie. Area Meeting did send me a greeting card which I will have to answer with a greeting card to each requesting they read one Icarus Project post rather than just sign a card.) I hope they don't visit me before I have arranged to send my front door keys to my neighbour, Claire Jones who has not answered an e-mail requesting she get ready to receive it. I need my printer, my collection of CDs and my collection of computer print outs for a start. Today when I asked about arranging to have my printer brought from Manchester they told me it would probably be easier to spend another £165 to buy another one. They promised me three weeks ago they would take me to buy a printer, but that was just an excuse to justify their ultra-stingy access to photocopying.
Well there has been another great Schroedinger's cat mystery to be unsolved since leaving Meadowbrook. They insisted on putting most of my belongings except what I could cram into the space beneath the desk in my room when they were steam cleaning my room. They told me it would be there until I could take the stuff home but I needed my documents and did not get them until after a buggered up meeting with Chris Green. He had no idea I was furious with staff for not letting me retrieve my documents when they told me I just needed to ask for access to my stuff and it would be granted. When in the minutes before the ambulance was due to take me to the wrong hospital, Cambrian Hospital Nottingham, which is a female rehabilitation hospital instead of Cambrian Group Hospital at Storthfield House, South Normanton, they simply told me that all my stuff from the room HAD DISAPPEARED! I suspect it is Schroedinger's cat playing God with the fact that nobody took a blind bit of notice what happened to items like -- a signed football from Stuart Potts, my limited collection of CDs including my favourite Prokofiev piano concertos and the five BBC Music Magazine CDs that had come in my mail from home and my Brahms piano trios and the last two remaining shirts from Barry's menswear, which has now closed that I was frightened of wearing in the hospital in case, like my Truth Never Dies tee shirt they get lost in the anonymous clothes that form the basis of my collection of tee shirts from The Spinney.
I believe I am as brilliant as Einstein. No one else could postulate that the speed of light was what bound time and space together in the Special Theory of Relativity. That is a simple as second year algebra to understand but if everything is already travelling at the speed of light it makes the mystics' vision of reality much more cogent. But I have postulated that everything is already travelling at the speed of light, which explains why quantum effects take place faster than speed of light could connect two events, such as measuring the spin of half a pair of electrons.
The three devastating postulations of one eventful night in about October were first that we had no need to worry about entropy making the universe run out of energy. This is an unusual universe in only having a single white hole to produce an inanimate universe that naturally evolves towards Buddhahood. Most universes have numerous white holes producing fully formed societies. We have the white holes of the beginning of conscious life on earth with every conception. If you have the faith that you can aim for a particular rebirth by choosing a particular black hole then you have a mechanism that can explain extra-terrestrial sightings as beings from other universes who have gone into a black hole deliberately to be reborn out of a white hole with a body and space ship designed to make best use of our laws of physics. They are here to help us, but are waiting for the Salford Green Party Revolution to start to make it safe to come down in any but the most fleeting of encounters.
The next postulation was that the entire universe must be vibrating between black holes and white holes at at least ten to the fiftieth Herz to be able to put the entire quantum mechanics history of the universe in every single subatomic particle. In other words the Hindus are right to consider there is Vishnu the creator God and Vishnu the destroyer God. This explains why subatomic particles die at one point in the universe to reappear at another one.
The third postulate is the most optimistic one of the lot. Because the universe is a skilful place FOR EVERY BLACK HOLE THERE IS A BETTER WHITE HOLE. Even the extermination of the Jews in the holocaust was done in the best preparation for rebirth imaginable. The victims were made to feel totally humiliated and helpless when they were sent to the gas chambers. When my ever so precious holocaust survivor from Auschwitz, Judith Stenberg came to visit me during ne of the long spells in hospital before my superpsychosis had matured into one that no filth if going to stop, although it still causes me all sorts of problems, like being completely incapable of sending out any thunderbolts of enlightenment to any people in particular. Floyd Bailey is patiently waiting for that to happen. He is my most loyal disciple as you can read in his web pages:
Here are a few URLs of my posts. Please read this one first. It is 47 pages long
It is called "From a Brutal Murderer Bodhisattva, Floyd Bailey" 646 views and
also "First Manic Scripture, 1979" which is only six pages long
Letter to my first Meditation Teacher
From clicking spirituality at the top of any of these posts you can get to most of my Icarus project posts. To go to three under Experiencing Madness and Extreme Mental States go to the board index and find
Infinite Psychosis and Messiahhood for All
which is the most complete history of my mental hospital admissions.
Also Miserable (not) and Manic
Posts: 230
Joined: Jan 22, 2015 11:21 pm

Re: I finally Just Need a History to Be Taken

Postby oregonjunco » Sep 21, 2017 3:38 pm

This is a continuation of the last letter.

Judith Steinberg was so impressed that I was trying to set up a dana economy when the only goods I could offer were a limited supply of peanuts and raisons and copious quantities of cigarette butts that she asked me what I was doing. I told her I was trying to resurrect the other six members of Red Rope who had killed themselves since Vanessa Crummie, whose resurrection I had experienced in Austria and that had led to me being drugged up to the eyeballs on huge quantities of droperidol. She told me that with faith in the resurrection like that I would have found Auschwitz as enjoyable as a holiday camp as the peer support was terrific. She had earlier explained that although Christ was not the Jewish Messiah as he would be a great political leader he was one of the greatest of all Jewish rabbis. She evidently believed he resurrected as she had been taught in a good Catholic school in Hungary and thus was the only family member who could address Josef Mengele in German when he told the joke that made her remember him warmly. About the ONLY story she would tell to Gentiles about Auschwitz as the story that when they disembarked from the train and were being shepherded into two lines, one for the gas chamber now and another for more time to think about it he asked Judith who these people were with her. She introduced her mother, father , six brothers and sister. Mengele feigned astonishment, "No surely this is not your mother. It must be your sister with her beautiful, long, blonde hair!" That represents being sent to the gas chamber with an element of humanity, rather than the clinical detachment of the US death row farrago.
Judith then asked me whether there was anything she could do. I asked her to lay her hands on my head for a few minutes and try to wish me the blessings of all the victims, survivors AND THE NAZIS at Auschwitz. Although I was on too much droperidol to feel much at the time I now feel ore certain that those brutal deaths resulted in all the holocaust victims being transported to a pure land in Hell from which they could fulfil any Jewish messianic dream they would wish. In other words Josef Mengele is a SADISTIC BODHISATTVA like all the greatest political and military leaders.

I only saw Judith once after that. I had got myself admitted as a voluntary patient when my psychosis had burned out and had confidently been using what I now call "Enforced Tranquil Abiding" meditation with several women on the ward.
When I came in I succeeded in getting myself admitted as a voluntary patient who wanted a safe place to explore my psychosis and mature it by getting one of the student nurses from Hope Hospital casualty, who came in the ambulance to Cheadle Royal with me, to allow me to "take her hostage" by allowing me to tie my shirt round her wrists so she would be as submissive as me and would recognise when I would feel threatened. I started by asking some of the vulnerable women on the ward to let me put a blindfold on myself and the tie a bicycle toe clip strap round my wrists so I could be their prisoner and they could take me for a meal in the dining room and feed me with a fork or ask them to take me anywhere in the hospital they fancied and just interact with people. It was real fun. Many of these women have never had a partner who is submissive to them before. In fact the women who end up on psychiatric units are the most targeted by men who want to rape women.
Anyway after about two days of this I decided I would go to the Manchester Buddhist Centre to demonstrate the practice when my superpsychosis was as well developed as it had ever been. I was met by one of the mitras and I asked him would he mind discussing my spiritual progress with me in the shrine room with my hands tied behind my back which would have enabled me to be as submissive as possible but he was scared shitless. I now realise that teaching Rinzai Zen is about being scared shitless into doing the impossible
but I did not expect the thought of me in bondage to be so impossibly troubling to someone when I had been trying to have a dialogue with a member of the Triratna Movement when I was high, rather than when I am brain dead on drugs for the whole of the previous four years. I really could not understand why this mitra should use power mode towards me instead of love mode. I became desperate. As I was about to leave I challenged him to give me a blessing by mentioning any of the sacred mantras of Buddhism. He was so concerned at protecting himself from my spirituality he would not even give me mantra. So the very last thing I did to him was to reflect his power mode back at him by punching him once on the forehead and then left.
I then went to visit Judith Steinberg for what was to be the last time. I told her I had something important to tell her that she might not like and it would be far better for both of us if she tied my wrists together behind my back. Once she had done that I told her that the reason her son Joshua had had a breakdown at university just before his final exams in business school because his fiancée had just jilted him was because she had pressured him into being able to take over the family leatherware wholesale business when he had really wanted to become a rabbi. Her greatest asset had been her ability to survive Auschwitz and she had failed to pass on the family initiation. She listened respectfully and then we had a really deep conversation about Auschwitz. I even asked her, "What was the worst thing about Auschwitz?" She responded immediately that it was THAT THEY HAD NO TOILET PAPER IN AUSCHWITZ. I can just imagine it. In the precious part of the camp where they would not take you to the gas chambers but still no toilet paper. There presumably was no where to wash your hands either.
Anyway the leather handcuffs had been so successful in making her less defensive that she almost forgot to untie me as I left. At one point she rang the hospital and the night nurse, Ken Jones, a Buddhist, told her to make sure I came back to the hospital that night. I had had no idea that just because the mitra at the Buddhist Centre refused to take a history as I am always violent AFTER staff have told me there is no point in taking a history because they have already decided to vandalise my brain with drugs that will only make me higher when I come off them and in the meantime make you feel almost in suicidal despair.

You messed up real bad when I arrived at your home the day before my appeal tribunal in 2006 demanding you chain me to a bed until the appeal; the next day as I feared an injection of haloperidol to completely wipe out my messianic vision which I knew I needed to have as you evidently still have no idea what I am taking about when I say I have united relativity and quantum mechanics through the INFINITE MEETING FOR WORSHIP and Quaker Quantum Mechanics. I have paid a total of $35,100 to Leon Benson's campaign to free him from a wrongful conviction for murder. I needed to spend £500 to get you to actually read and photocopy the documents that you said you had glanced at. Those documents were all you would ever have needed to illustrate every aspect of my superpsychotic carer. When I am high I write pure scripture. It is not as literary as the Qur'an or as inspiring as the John Gospel but it has the same message as all the hopeless letters that George Fox wrote in prison to show he loved his oppressors as much as I love all my prisoner friends. My scriptures feel like they are being written like Saint Paul's epistles. They are all letters written to particular people attending to particular problems that might need addressing.
I first thought of publishing my work when I was in The Spinney and the writer in residence told me I would first of all need to organise what I wanted to put into each chapter. I think they are already sorted out into chapters on the Icarus project pages and I definitely want to publish David Evans' complete letters. It is fifty four pages long.

You could have saved me if you had suggested getting a bed in a cheap hotel like the Premier Inn in Manchester so I could escape from the police who came twice to take me back. The first time I successfully explained I NEEDED to prepare some documentation for my mental health appeal tribunal the next day. It was Paul Oldfield who you should have defended on the grounds that he was a fully enlightened paranoid schizophrenic who would not give a shit whether he lived or died when he set the fire as witness he did not get water from the kitchen to douse the flames and he sat in the bathroom waiting for chaos to rule supreme. But at least after I was scared shitless by Wendy Olsen expressing her "concern" at the burnt out state I had deliberately gone to the Salford Green Party AGM hoping for an opportunity to get a Salford Green Party care plan from heaven which would involve how to support me and allow my manias to mature when they go over the top like that one did. I did not get the care plan from heaven; in fact I got the care plan from Hell. I got the LIVING CRUCIFIXION scenario all over again, but this time, because Paul Oldfield told me if I had fifty five pounds in my wallet I should be able to stay in a bed and breakfast like he always does when he absconds.
That information in 2006 would have enabled me to tell the doctor at my tribunal that I had not said I had found the mistake that God made in making the universe and wanted to mend it, what I actually meant was that given that I had been routinely conferring with bodhisattvas with versions of relativity that do not even have a single dimension of time then it struck me as quite perverse that most of the pressing problems associated with mental hospitals and prisons would be completely impossible in such a universe. In a universe where time is tubular and a few centuries wide it is so easy to plant individual rain forests on individual planets that they even told me they thought haloperidol would be useful for getting rid of spam rain forests! This was an extra cosmic recommendation for haloperidol as the anti-psychotic of choice.
But that was before I realised the extent of the Quaker Quantum Mechanics which could be used to perform miracles like making sure no nuclear weapon fired in anger, (or even the dud trident nuclear launch abort off the coast of Florida) should ever be allowed to have its navigation systems work as though conventional quantum mechanics prevailed. In other words if the North Koreans were ever to send a missile to mainland USA it would either land on Disneyworld and not explode or it would devastate the extreme North coast of California thus liberating all the prisoners in Pelican Bay into either heaven or the Hell of a Pelican Bay prison modelled on the best Tibetan monastery outside Tibet, which is what my Icarus Project posts are already designed to bring about.
But now I am going supermanic again I am even thinking that string theory and the idea of a multiverse may indicate that this is already a universe with more than one dimension of time, but our brains have not yet caught up to the demands such a universe would place on us. Even the Hell realms with the Antarctic Eskimos are nominally universes with a single dimension of time but a much faster speed of light which is necessary to be able to keep track of the numerous intelligences available on the natural internet to help with any problem at all, especially with a mental health appeal that needs at least five hundred pounds worth of actually reading ALL my Icarus Project posts. Please note that when I have money I throw it at Leon Benson's struggle but I could do with spending that sort of money on my own appeal so I can afford to send ninety six page bundles to even more lucky prisoners in the new Tibet.

I want to find a Manchester Friend to look after the money I want to spend on charitable aims. Until I have designed a Salford Green Party Bank Account at Mount Street to borrow money against equity bought to give generosity gifts to people you hardly expect ever to pay you back I want someone to whom I can pay all but about one thousand of my pounds to then send a thousand dollars to David Evans and Floyd Bailey, using someone's Jpay account other than mine as I think the authorities have blocked my credit cards. I would also like to use the money to send cheques to the charities mentioned in The Friend as I am no longer paying my usual £1,200 per year into the "This week's collection" now I have not attended a Central Manchester meeting since 14 August 2016. That way the tax payer who send the cheques could collect the gift aid on the donations.
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