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Trying to connect

The complexities of friendship, parenting, family life, and intimate relationships while navigating extreme states of mind. From mad parenting tips, to questions about polyamory, to sibling rivalry or feeling shunned by friends once you "came out' as mad. Note: explicitly sexual topics should go in the sex/sexuality forum.

Trying to connect

Postby plum pelican » Jun 14, 2017 8:33 pm

My brother & I created a joint username that we are planning to share. He struggles with really bad social anxiety & I'm trying to help him out. I am writing this with his input/approval. He is 30 years old (I'm 32) and has been struggling his entire life to be a part of society. The older he gets the harder it seems. He has had many different diagnoses (autism, bipolar, schizoeffective), types of treatment, hospitalizations, etc. None of them have really helped, and some might have even made things worse for him.

He lives at home with our parents and has a complicated relationship with them, though they try to be supportive. He has a girlfriend who is really great. She lives in another state and they see each other on weekends. She and I are pretty much his only connections to other people. He doesn't have a job, though he desperately wants one and is working with a voc rehab program.

He feels completely disconnected from the outside world, and this worsens his depression. But his social anxiety is so severe that he feels incabable of reaching out or meeting people. Does anyone have any advice? Is there anyone here who struggles with social anxiety and has figured out techniques for making connections?

- Jess & Dan
plum pelican
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Re: Trying to connect

Postby Blackskull » Jun 14, 2017 9:38 pm

The warmest of welcomes to you, fascinating dual entity.

Seeing that we have a new member put a pleasant feeling in my heart.

We need more new members of our Mad Family to join us, thus I am grateful for your presence.

Sometimes a new member's first post goes unintentionally unnoticed, so I hope that you do not feel ignored.
I see that you had yet to receive a reply so I just wanted to say welcome to Icarus and show you this...


If you do not get much response on this thread, please post your introduction on my thread. I am certain that my friends will notice your arrival should you choose to do so, and I assure you that they will be pleased to meet you both.

I hope that you find everything that you came here searching for.

Whoever you both are, whatever you both may be, I accept you exactly as you are.

Mad love to you.

As Above, So Below; As Within, So Without.
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Location: Campbell's Bay, Quebec

Re: Trying to connect

Postby Blackskull » Jun 14, 2017 9:46 pm

Do not lose hope.

I completely withdrew from the world and lived in isolation for years. At that point I was certain that I would live out my days alone as a hermit.

I now have four beautiful children and a life full of love.

Although I still do not go out into the world, the best parts of the world come to me in the forms of my closest family and friends.

I went from being locked up against my will in insane asylums, to living alone in the country, to living wonderfully out in that same countryside with all the companionship that I could ever want.

It is never hopeless.
As Above, So Below; As Within, So Without.
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Location: Campbell's Bay, Quebec

Re: Trying to connect

Postby EmpressofEden » Jun 15, 2017 4:02 pm

Hello Plum Pelican, welcome to the community! We're so glad to have you! I have also struggled with anxiety and depression. I was first diagnosed nearly 18 years ago now. I can certainly relate to how you are feeling right now! Some days felt so hopeless, like it would never end. Having anxiety and wanting to heal but seeing no progress can be very frustrating and lead to feelings of despair. Know that you are not in this alone and that it CAN get better. It sounds to me like you've got a good support system between your family and your girlfriend. It's great that you have people in your life who truly care about you and love you. That in itself can make a huge difference! It has taken me many years to find out what works for me, what helps and what doesn't. I've done things such as changing my diet (I personally believe that our diet largely affects our mental health!)... added in some vitamins and nutrients as well as a probiotic and prebiotic. Recent studies suggest that there is a link between gut health and our minds. I also try to meditate sometimes. So I've made a lot of changes, and I'm getting better but I still have hard days. I may never be fully "healed" and I'm ok with that. Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Learning to heal and cope takes time. But don't give up! You can do this. Feel free to message me any time :)

You are not alone!

Love and blessings, my friend.
Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.
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Re: Trying to connect

Postby ojaloco » Jun 15, 2017 4:47 pm

Hi EmpressofEdden, wellcome to this community.
i hope u will find here what you need.
I am glad that your brother has lots of lovely people around.
please have in mind that i am not a native English speaker, so there can be some misunderstandings because of my poor English language. I am sorry about that.
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Joined: Mar 19, 2013 4:53 pm
Location: England

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