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Flighty today, I'd like to fly.

From one day to the next, today is the day I never want to die.
Ebb, Flow, this is how this maniacal thing goes.
So I talked to my wifey last night. I couldn't find the words to what was going through my head yesterday. Or one word. A word I never wanted to use in fear of looking or sounding like the whack job mother from Running With Scissors.
Nothing else fits so perfectly into the hole in my vocabulary to describe the state of being I'm currently residing within.
So I sit with my cigarette slowly burning,
 (this is before Marlboro went and made longer burning paper, and the damn thing could burn down to the butt without so much as a puff...the idiots kill it for us all a good part of the time...)
Stare into some wayward distance,
At the life that should have been,
(this is before the snap, click, break, poof you’re a basket case!)
And began to look for the escape under, over, through the wall.
Because by God this is America,
And sane or insane,
overcoming is what we Americans do.
Love, Cha Li